Is Women’s intuition always such a good thing?

A Cambridge psychologist came up with some convincing evidence that certain brains (usually females) are very sensitive to picking up on the feelings of others, interpreting them and responding to them. Other brains (males) are less skilled at the touchy feely stuff but compensate by being more technical; having more advanced numeracy skills, or a greater sense of spatial awareness, for example. – ivillage.

I think women are very empathetic. When their partners/friends feel unhappy, they feel every bit of the pain. They can sometimes get into a destructive spiral of self-blame.

1929

1929.

night out with the girls!
sha and i were discussing what to do online. dinner slowly turned into slumber party then it finally evolved into a hotel night stay. We had to struggle with shen over the remote control.
she was being patriotic and all over the olympic games. Decor’s really neat. Room’s small, perfect for lovers or solo travelers. but we couldn’t complain, it is after all a boutique hotel.
Cheryl warned me enough already. heh. she suggested eating at Amber but it was too late by the time pheebs arrived. We ended up slurping fish porridge at Maxwell.
which really is nothing to shout about if you ask my honest opinion.

Walked around the area and saw interesting characters littered across the pavements.

Email love. bang to the kok.

Hello Daddy.

Im flying to bangkok tonight.
back next week. I thought you knew about it cause i told Mum. Assumed she told you.

Apparently, she didn’t. sorry lah.
we did the booking last minute after my exams also.

buy you shirt k. but you also never wear.
my phone’s abit conky lately. call cannot hear, i think i dropped too many times. (hint to buy new phone for birthday. bigger hint Nokia E66 in black steel. )
so dont panic if you cannot reach me in bangkok.

i will sms you guys.

Flying via Air Asia. 840 flight. (80 dollars ticket! joys of underpaid worker.)

email you later.

Love,
chyar.

Just heard about your Bkk trip yesterday. Enjoy and be good.

Don’t remember about any shirt? It was a tee-shirt. (i bought him shirt from phuket)

SAME THING.

see how lah. if got not nice t shirt, i buy something else. but my bag very small.

im starting on a diet programme next week. 10 days lose 6 kilos! sham’s friend recommended.

so go bangkok im going to gorge.

I AM ALWAYS GOOD. (Want to believe but not so sure though……..)

Treasure it that’s why didn’t put on lah…….

I LOVE MY DAD.

bye people!

Healing

• Experiencing your emotions in your body. Numbing or avoiding painful feelings can interrupt healing. And going over and over the details of what happened, why it happened, what you could have done to prevent it from happening is also not productive.

• Having the support of other people. Even if you aren’t comfortable talking about your feelings under normal circumstances, it’s important to talk about them when you’re grieving. Knowing that others are aware of your feelings and understand your grief will make you feel better, less alone with your pain, and will help you heal.
  

A note about repeating your story to others

After a while repeating your story in its entirety can grow tedious for you and for others who have listened repeatedly to the same story. But this doesn’t mean that you have to pretend. You can briefly express your feelings to a good friend without having to explain further: “I’m still not my old self,” “I still feel sad, angry,” etc. Not having to be dishonest helps you feel better. Friends will also benefit from the good feelings they get from seeing that they have helped you – just by listening. ( I will listen AND rant if you need me to.)

• Eat regular, balanced meals – Letting yourself get run down physically makes you feel even worse.
• Exercise daily – more than once a day if possible. Even if you have to force yourself to do it, exercise releases endorphins that will fill you with positive feelings.
• Avoid alcohol and other mind-altering chemicals. Blocking you feelings won’t make them go away and will only prolong suffering. (OPTIONAL)
• Consider having a ceremony or other ritual. Rituals help some people create meaningful symbolic ends.

A note about rituals

I have a lighter if you need a burning pit.

Dad

My dad emailed me something last night but i only got the chance to read it half an hour ago. It made me cry. The words were so powerful and i could really feel him talking to me from within.

I am so moved and blessed that I have my dad. Despite our constant fights, arguments, disagreements… we still find ways to connect. We’re both very strong characters. Neither would back down in a stand off. And we could never find the way to say the things we want to say to each other’s faces.

But i know he knows and he knows i know.

I feel happy when he takes the time off his busy schedule to email me. Although some of the emails were arguments as well.

To read those words, i could really hear him.

I love you too daddy. So much.

And no, I will not let go of your hand when you need me next time. I promise.

“Romance fails us and so do friendships, but the relationship of parent and child, less noisy than all others, remains indelible and indestructible, the strongest relationship on earth.”

-Theodor Reik

Old things new.

Night&Day

liz recommended this place. i LOVE IT!
tucked in e corner of selegie road, filled with art graffiti on the walls, good music, comfy setting. so cozy!

balls of fury.

Finding yourself

The past 3 years have been more than just a complete blur. At this point in my life, I think I dare say the period has been an awakening period for me. It is a hell of a start, being able to recognize what makes you happy. I never felt such…calmness within me before. They say you cannot morph yourself into a character, you must hammer and forge yourself one. Sometimes, others hammer and beat you into a pulp to be someone they want you to be. It would be unfair for me to say I regretted the past years. I say it out loud because I feel I have been very unfair to myself. The thing is, I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended where I intended to be.

If that period has taught me one thing, is that we all run away all the time to avoid coming face to face with ourselves and the truth. Now I realize, the truth isn’t all that bad. It’s ok. I thought it was going to break me into pieces and I will never find the courage and strength to stand up ever again. But now that I have seen the truth, I’ve dealt with it in my own way. And really, it is not all that bad. Humans are the greatest adapters.

It is a puzzling thing. The truth knocks on the door and you say “Go away, I’m looking for the truth.” And so it goes away. Puzzling. Life is not about finding the truth. It is whether you want to see it. I chose to not see it then.

It is a great thing when you realize you still have the ability to surprise yourself. Makes me wonder what else I can do that I’ve forgotten about. That is the way things come clear. All of a sudden. Out of nowhere. And then you realize how obvious they’ve been all along.

So do I really regret the past 3 years? Although I wished I could have played the game differently to spare me the pain and tears, I don’t regret it. If I didn’t get lost, there’s a chance I would never be found.

Let your heart guide you. It whispers, so listen carefully. -Littlefoot’s mother, Land Before Time

Love

Love does not brag. People who are truly in love refrain from rehearsing their good traits just to show off. Bragging in a relationship often is really defensive. I am guilty as charged. But i have served my sentence.

Love does not require unneeded pressure. Remember, if you look for trouble, you will find it every time.

People who truly love look forward to their relationship growing more meaningful and precious. They have hope. That is an attitude that happily anticipates the good.

Someone sent me a condescending text message once. She said that i was in no position to preach values. She is so right. Everyone has choices to pick and i am in no position to judge the choices others make.

Remember though, we all make decisions but those decisions make us.

She also said that one needs to play the cards that have been dealt to you. Do i think she is right? I don’t think so. Dealers are everywhere, ever ready with their deck of cards but the choice is yours to make which game you want to play and how you want to play it. And when you are gambling away too much, you need to know when to stand up and walk away from the game. Some people simply do not know how. Those condescending messages were hurtful to say the least, especially since i was under the impression we were both fighting for the same cause. To be shot down like that for wanting to help…maaaannnnnn.

Too much hatred. I probably should be more understanding. Grappling with failure is tough isn’t it? And especially when the truth is not out yet to those around you. To carry around that weight and pretend to be happy… tsk. i understand. For that, i must apologise.

Love and Hate are both strong emotions. Both equally filled with passion. Both good in their own ways. But when you start feeling indifferent. That is the worst of the entire lot. Because indifference? It is the same as not having emotions at all. Right now, sweetheart? I am indifferent towards you. And honey bunny? I am walking away from the game.

Never ask for love – you should receive love because your partner wants to give you love – not because you want it from your partner.

Finally, do not force love – it will come in good time, it will come.

Facebook

Asiaone ran an article yesterday, “Teens’ lives are an open (face)book.”

Evidently, facebook is very addictive. Uploading pictures to share with your friends have never been made easier.

Comments, tagging of pictures…everything.

So, with such an open portal, lines are bound to be crossed.

*WHOLE CHUNK OF TEXT DELETED COURTESY OF ANAK JOHAR.* -.-

spoke to S 2 nights ago. We were driving home and told him that i was searching the website for certain things. And then he exclaimed, “siao zhabor. So free ah?”

truth of the matter is, I WAS at that point in time. Hence my research instincts came out. The thing is, it was done at my personal capacity. I didn’t open up a Pandora box that pissed people off. (except that shipping boy but he is of no value to me). Anyhows, I was just reading stuff to fuel my curiosity.

SO.. point is, people do all sorts of things when they are free. Pick up a new sport, new activity, what have you. Speaking of which, I would love to pick up hip hop dance class. anyone?

Free time:

S sleeps with the cat when he has free time. Which is most of the time really. Then shelly nuzzles his face with her wet nose -time to let the cat out. Shelly meows-time to feed the cat. Shelly meows again-time to open the washroom door so she can pee. Shelly meows non stop- he covers his face with a pillow but the cat squeezes her head in between anyways. Until he has to get OUT of bed to entertain her for a while. Proceeds to snap photos of her and sends them to me at work.

Me? I can spend hours on the internet portal digging stuff. I should consider being a spy. I cook when i have the ingredients. I poke shelly’s butt to piss her off. Find fault with S just so that I have someone to argue with. Successfully bug S to get out of the house to go drive around the island.

You? Threaten to incur the wrath of others. Do useless things and then proceed to plaster it all over the place for the viewing pleasure of others. (much to our discomfort, annoyance and inability to avoid it). Why? Are you really that free? Is there not enough drama already? If I have enough free time on my hand to entertain you, i would do more than just pen this little short paragraph, I would love to bring a hailer to your face and scream “WHY DO YOU DO THIS.” -.- but because I would rather use my free time to go poke my cat’s butt. Hence, you have to settle for this paragraph.

And to quote, “Thanks for the memories….but really… we have all moved on.”

Consider doing that during your free time? Or you can poke another cat’s butt. Just not humans’.

Thank you very much.

The perils of evolving media.

I shall go off now before the bubble of calm decides to abandon me.

the departure.

the support system.

funny how labels are created.

Timbre@Arts House

busy busy like a beeeeeee…..