boredom is EVIL!

Boredom

it sets your mind thinking. For the first time in a long long while, i am sitting at work with absolutely nothing to do.

Ok, im lying. i do have things to do but im still in my holiday mood and all my clients are on leave so no one is chasing me and ive been busy facebooking with my manager in tow. how awesome yo.

Rules of engagement

Apparently there are so many i wonder which idiot had all the time in the world to come up with them.

I for one am clearly flouting each and every one of them. But hey, then again, it’s me we’re talking about here.

It’s like walking on a sheet of broken glasses. EVERYWHERE you walk, you’re sure to get a splinter. I kid you not.

i think i have fought with S more times in this one year then the 5 years that we’ve been together. It’s strange really cause 2 weeks before the party, i was out with a couple of friends. One of which coincidentally just got married.

His first reaction when i broke it to him was, ” Oh no… don’t lydia. just dont. if you love each other, just get married and screw this process!”

Those non-malays would prolly not understand the gravity of this situation and im far too lazy to describe the process. The number of people just involved in this entire space you’ve built with your other half is scary. Suddenly, they are walking around with this new found responsibility. They suddenly have a say!

what.

Apparently, where they come from, it’s called advice. Rubbish is more like it.

I feel angsty all the time and naturally the relationship gets the brunt of it.

someone should sue Disney for planting the ideas in little kids heads that every girl has a prince and everything ends up happily ever after.

See, love never dies a natural death. It dies because we don’t know how to replenish its source. It dies of blindness and errors and betrayls.

We are all guilty of that.

Life when engaged

Those who are in an engagement don’t really talk about it. It’s almost taboo to discuss this. Let alone in a public portal.

But i shall adopt the role of a responsible and kind citizen by dispensing some personal experiences.

1) If you love your other half. For the love of god, screw the engagement process and just bloody get married. The amounting pressure on the engagement is just a bloody pain in the ass. You are under constant scrutiny. Both families are watching your every move and everything is placed under a microscope. oh… and everyone suddenly has tunnel vision: marriage.

2) If you still need to go through the engagement process, then keep it short. the longer you go through it, the more problems will surface. I think, you start looking at your other half as a husband more than a partner. you start developing questions like “Is he able to support me?” “What if he finds my amounting pile of clothes annoying?” “What if i can’t connect with the family?” (You’d be jolly well surprised, that even after many years, you are still struggling to learn the in-laws way of living. it’s normal i think. i hope.)

3) FLIP THE PAGES OF HISTORY IF YOU HAVE TO. See, my take is simple. get it out and clear it out of your system. Do not linger a minute longer. Have an issue, say it out. do not let it dwell in your being because it is poisonous.

4) don’t apologize if you don’t mean it.

5) telling your other half that you’re not going to do it again is not an apology im afraid. that is just saying, “Oh, i dont think it was wrong but since it’s making your hormones all psycho and suicidal then ok, i wont do it again.” WHAT IS THIS. -.-

5) have sufficient me-time. You can only allow someone to love you when you have enough of self-giving because you wouldn’t know how to love you if you havent done any lately. you would spend all your energy cursing your other half for not loving you correctly when you dont even know how to! If you love life, then don’t squander time. i am famous for that.

6) If people tell you that forgiveness is choosing to love. and that it is the first skill of self-giving love. They’ve probably not been in a relationship before.

7) don’t hope. Hope is the worst of evils, for it prolongs the torments of man. faith yes. Hope? NO. you want something, you work for it. Dont sit there and expect the cake to bake by itself.

8 ) If all fails, make sure you have a safety net. just make sure you only tell the necessary. and make sure if your other half is psychotic, he/she never finds out. Also, make sure your safety net is someone/people who is/are capable enough of helping you out. Is well enough to dispense advice. If you just want a listening ear, go speak to the trees in the forests. At least you know for sure the trees are not going to tell anyone else.

9) if you do not have a safety net or do not have time to go to the forest, let me know. I’ll introduce you to my very very good friend: Apple Juice. and boy, believe you me, you will be in love after this.

Marriage Plans

Is just plain annoying. I wonder why a marriage planner is not an essential part of being married. you know? Like how you get pregnant and you need to have a gynae? why is it that when you’re planning for a wedding, there isn’t a planner in near sight? Pray tell me.

At first i was all excited and going through booklets of locations and food menus and rushing to the next wedding exhibitions. But now?

S and i are planning our AFTER wedding plans. yes, we are strange like that. we’re thinking of our trips AFTER the wedding.

We talk about the house and getting a new cat (ok, this one abit one-sided but hey, someone needs to start first).

and suddenly the marrige is like, ok, let’s just bloody get a venue and get someone is capable enough to do EVERYTHING in a bundle so we can snuggle in and watch cable with Shelly.

That is how lazy we are. or maybe that’s how lazy i am.

I dont even want to go and hunt for clothes. i have decided to save money and tailor my dress for below 2oo bucks. cheapo.

i think my mum is more excited than i am.

I want it to be nice but im far too lazy to sieve through everything. oh my godzzzz….

how now brown cow?

I think S is great when it comes to this. His amounting patience on such nitty gritty details is so amazing that i want to coddle him till he chokes.

Typical convo:

“Ok, what you think of venue ABC?”

“Can lah.”

“you like the space?”

“Oklah. big enough.”

“then how? The plan like that? Pass?”

“dont know leh. can lah i think. what do you want?”

“ok, so here’s a pile of food menus *dumps stacks of printed venues, food menus, price list*”

“*gets excited for a while” yay! ok, we’ll go through it! *gets distracted in the next second by Shelly’s odd behaviour*”

that is the progression of our wedding plans. that is how terrible we are. -.-

My perfect wedding plan?

everyone come, everyone eat, everyone laugh and everyone go for after party while i crash into the hotel suite with S.

and then next morning? Fly out to Maldives to dive with the fishies…. bloop bloop bloop.

not bad. no?

aiya ya ya ya ya.

boredom. is. dangerous.

So dan directed me to his favourite website:

icanhazcheezburger.com